what you should know about Nathan Grey

1. a cute girl is a 100 times more beautiful than a model
2. he can easily fall in love with a cute girl even if he's seeing her for the first time
3. wear a dress and his eyes are going to melt from the joy
4. eyes and hair are the first things he sees in girl
5. don't try to act too wise for your age, that isn't cute
6. don't swear, don't smoke, don't abuse alcohol or you'll fall in his eyes forever
7. he likes challenges....but not the impossible ones
8. he doesn't like to play games
9. he is shy, you can even say that he is overly/super shy
10. he is never content with himself, never
11. he doesn't like shallow people
12. he has a secret problem which he only shares with people closest to him
13. he's weirder than he looks
14. he might be fighting for you without you noticing it
15. there's nothing more important to him than his family
16. never be afraid to speak your opinion to him
17. you can always be sure that he's gonna take care of you, just don't be afraid to look vulnerable
18. give him time to get used to you
19. there's a lot to know about him
20. don't be afraid to look childish with him, he's a child too

sabai.deviantart.com

I am a 19-year old who...

loves to walk on sidewalk curbs.

loves spending time with his family.

considers his sister to be one of his best friends.

enjoys taking long walks.

enjoys listening to music like Cinematic Orchestra.

often dreams to live in 1940s or even 1850s.

is a never dying romanticist.

overrates logic in life.

doesn't know how to act around a girl he likes.

loves to spend his time with people he loves without alcohol or drugs.

can be emotionless sometimes.

is easily irritated by nowadays way of communication.

loves to walk on sidewalk curbs.

jacinabox3408.deviantart.com

Laughter

I hate to see pretty girls like that sitting alone. The first thought that always hits me is to go and sit near her, talk to her, ask her what or who is she waiting for, maybe try and make her laugh. I love to see girls laugh, they are the most pretty when they laugh, smile or are very focused about something. Me on the other hand… I remember my friend once told me “You keep faking a smile or a laugh” I felt embarrassed because my mask has been seen trough and I admitted it, “You shouldn’t do that, just don’t smile or laugh, instead of faking it”. I try, really hard, but the thing is that I very rarely find things to be as funny as it is for other people. For instance in middle-school my classmates would laugh until they stomachs hurt, if another classmate says something inappropriate or makes a silly mistake without noticing it, I would smile, try to fake a laugh or just look down, so no one would see my reaction. I have to admit, I don’t know if I can actually laugh anym…

- Watch out! – a scream woke me up from my day dreaming just in time for me to jump back evading a bicyclist. Apparently I’m not the only one daydreaming.
- Thank you, that was really close, you saved me and my camera – when I finally lifted up my eyes to look at my savior I saw the same girl at witch I was pointing my camera moments ago.

loveerica.deviantart.com

A counter-attack against vulgarism I

Sometimes apathy overruns my head and plays a game called "everyone around me seems to have absolutely different view of life" and it's mostly true. Every single person sees life diversely. I, on the other hand, tend to think that I have a more peculiar view of life. Since I can remember I had always used logic to find a solution to any problem. I would consider every outcome of every possible solution and choose the one which would make me most happy. This rule would apply even when trying to find a solution for problems related to "love":

-           Would you like a refill, Nate? - a pleasant voice of a waitress interrupted my mind.

-           No, thank you, I'm good - she smiled at me and walked away to the other table.

I was having breakfast in a small restaurant called "Eden", the name itself attracted me the moment I saw it and after a while it became a tradition to have breakfast here. I prefer having breakfast here because this way I can enjoy my morning and don't have to spend time making the breakfast myself, not that I'm in a hurry, I have been unemployed for a week now. This also has something to do with my "peculiar" way of seeing life. I had a well-paid job but I didn't enjoy it, so a couple of months later I decided to quit. I had earned enough money to last me for another couple of months so at the moment I wasn't concerned about not having a job.

            "Eden" was a small but quiet restaurant and that was probably my favorite feature about it. I love being around people but too much noise instantly makes me grab my headphones and isolate myself from the environment. The people working in the restaurant were all nice individuals, I mean they were never rude with their customers and they understood the fact that I'm not much of a "conversation starter", so they would usually leave me alone with my plate of waffles and a cup of fruit tea:

-           Thanks for the breakfast Jeremy! - I shouted through the noise of the kitchen to the chef.

-           Have a nice morning Nate! - I paid my bill and left the restaurant. It was a beautiful morning in the city. I wasn't much of a driver so I went to the bus stop and took the bus going to the central park. It was spring so I couldn't imagine a better place to relax then the central park, lying on the grass and enjoying the early breeze. As always I took my camera with me and I was feeling in the mood to take some pictures. One would think that after 8 years of living in the same city one would run out of things to shoot. But every day is different from another, every day you can see something unique. I was taking photos of the fountain, of all the people in the park, sometimes it feels like just pushing the shutter button is enough to have fun with photography, the sound of the mirror going up and down is probably my favorite sound in the world. I turned to the right, the lens of my photo camera was pointing to a girl sitting alone on the bench wearing a beautiful, colorful dress.

hiritai.deviantart.com

this is why you shouldn't be mine...

1. if you would smoke, I would constantly comment on it, I would express my disapproval through sarcasm
2. if we would have to live far from each other, I would talk all day how I want to see you to the point when it's not even cute
3. I would often just look at you without saying anything, to admire your eyes and your face and to get you smiling. no, it is sometimes creepy
4. I would ALWAYS be too shy to make a move first, no matter what situation. I would always analyse the possibility that you could say "no"
5. I am self-contained
6. I am boring
7. I take a long time to get comfortable around anyone and usually during that time people get an impression that I have no interest in them
8. I never know what to say
9. I don't tolerate "meow"'s or any other kind of sweet talks. it makes me sick, really
10. I hate when women swear or get drunk. and no I don't like when men do it either, I just don't care about that
11. it's hard for me to feel like I am "good enough"
12. I wouldn't let you make me say sorry when I haven't done anything wrong
13. I never know what to say
14. I could spend a whole evening lying with you in my arms, but I couldn't make myself go to clubs or dance modern dances
15. I would take photos of you all the time
16. I am shy
17. I am unusual
18. I am an intravert
19. I care too much about little things
20. I...never know what to say.

dorothy-shoes.deviantart.com

if she only...

...I'd silently get out of bed and make my way to the kitchen.
I'd cut her favorite fruit, cook some pancakes and serve it with fresh strawberries from our garden and make some fruit tea.
then I would silently get back to the bedroom, put down the lunch on the bed and wake her up with a gentle kiss on her cheek.
"good morning, love, enjoy" I would admire her smile and joy in her eyes and watch her enjoying the lunch.

because her smile is all I need to make me happy.

ronaaa.deviantart.com

wishes and needs

is it really that difficult? I just want this

sergey1984.deviantart.com

and that

kittysyellowjacket.deviantart.com

also this

dealingheart.deviantart.com

and how could I forget THIS

flickr.com/people/drierp/

Dear future Mrs. Grey

If you are reading this, then I guess you know what you have got yourself into. And the reason you are reading is probably because of my lack of sharing my thoughts with you.

I hope you are brave and patient, because if I am still the same guy I was a long time ago, I probably am super shy of myself and hard to understand also hard to get to.

I hope you don’t smoke or at least my constant comments about you smoking don’t get on your nerves too much. Because you’d probably turn out to be an amazing model while smoking.

I hope you are as geeky as I am and just enough interested in photography and movies.

I hope we spend evenings talking to each other about everything we can think of without being afraid to talk about boring topics.

I hope you can tolerate my inability to understand why men are always have to be the first to say “I’m sorry”, “I love you” and “hello” and also the inability to understand what you want or think if you’re only giving me hints.

I hope you’re not using me and your love is true.

I hope you are not shallow.

I hope you actually like me for the real me which is hard to do.

I hope I make you happy, I hope you are glad you have me.

I hope I am, what you have never thought you’ve wanted to have.

I hope you are not two-faced.

I hope We live in our little world.

tynkabillisek.deviantart.com

Emily

I couldn't believe how familiar she felt to me. I was standing on the shore of the lake just watching her. She was walking around searching for someone and then our eyes met, she started running towards me and all the men around her started searching for the person she's running to. The moment they would see me in their faces would appear an expression of incomprehension. Moments later I am in the water searching for something and when I go to the surface for some air I follow her with my eyes.
Never could I thought about something this intimate and so easy at the same time. My hands were sliding down her body and my lips were caressing her neck. We we're so close and I felt so fond of her as my hand was touching her coal black hair. Her name was Emily and that is a dream that will stay with me for quite some time…

aiwendillie.deviantart.com

Monster

"I live in my head. People love to pretend they're monsters, me, I spend my life pretending I'm not." 

By the silent rules that we all live based on, I am a monster. Monster, a person which actions can't be understood by a regular person, his behavior seems alien to a regular person. Since I can remember I've always done my best to fit in but people kept disappointing me with their views on…pretty much everything. While growing up I thought I experienced many feelings about which I don't have the slightest idea now. Love, laughter, passion are strange to me. Love as I saw it beyond the walls of my family always puts one person in the position of constantly being sorry. Laughter is the most frequently faked feeling by a monster. It's overused. And passion….for another person's body feels so…unnecessary and troublesome.

complejo.deviantart.com